Lesbionic Chronicles of Reproduction

Two Lines or One

2010-12-04T18:17:00.001-05:00

It was eleven days after our doctor’s appointment in the first week of November. Cool breezes and rustic leaves accompanied our third attempt and both my partner and I had high hopes this insemination would be the one that worked. We hadn’t even planned on taking a pregnancy test that day because we wanted to wait at least until my missed period. However on this day the excitement of the possibilities and the dread of another failed attempt filled our afternoon.
We were sitting on the couch sharing a unified longing to become parents once again. Our four year son was playing trucks on the carpet at our feet, and as we watched him play we talked about how he would be as a big brother. At this time my partner’s eyes became wild with anticipation. I knew she was going to ask me to take the test. I on the other hand wasn’t so keen on the idea because I was absolutely mortified of receiving bad news.
As the conversation continued sadness came over me. I decided that the insemination probably didn’t work anyway so it was best to just get it over it with. We put on our jackets and piled into the car. She drove while I wallowed in the pity party that was in full swing.
My partner turned to me and said “Just take the test and I’ll look for both of us, this way if it’s negative I just won’t tell you.”
She was crazy if she thought I would not want to know but since I was all ready feeling down I agreed. We arrived at the drugstore, picked out a couple home pregnancy tests and headed home.
Once at home, I headed straight to our bathroom to take the test. My heart was beating hard, my hands were shaking, and I was on the verge of tears. I just knew I wasn’t pregnant and I couldn’t handle the disappointment. I took the test and left it on the bathroom counter just as agreed. I headed to the living room to try and gather my emotions.
Minutes passed but I really felt like I was waiting for hours when my partner finally emerged. She had such a confused look on her face and I really couldn’t read her.
“Is there supposed to be two lines or one,” she said “because I can’t tell if there is another line here or not!”
I jumped up halfway in anger and shouted at her to stop playing games and tell me the truth. She replied, “Don’t get too excited but I think there is a faint line here!”
Practically inches away from tackling her, I grabbed the pregnancy test and to my surprise there were two lines! At that moment inside of a purely emotional state we both came to realize what the results of that test suggested. Jumping up and down I grabbed her yet again, but this time in a warm embrace. We laughed, we cried, we smiled.
Pregnant! At last our dreams became a reality and that’s where our journey began.

Some vids of my sweety pie!

2010-11-16T12:06:00.002-05:00

Pictures! Pictures!

2010-11-16T11:27:00.006-05:00

In order.............

*My dad, Gregory, and Jonathan at his Baptismal*

*C and I at Jonathans Baptismal*

*At around 3 months old*

*At around 2 months old*

*At around 1 month old*

*At Birth*

Terrible at blogging, but here's a story!

2010-11-16T10:04:00.003-05:00

OMG! I'm probably the worst blogger on Earth, but yet and still I try to keep up with it...
Anyway, so I know it's been over 3 mos already since I had the baby, but I must get the story out!
So it all started on July 18th.
All day i wished, please let the baby come today! I was so tired of being pregnant...sick, heavy, tired, and anxious; I just wanted my baby to come. C and I talked about getting induced at our next appt which was only days away.
Later that night I started having some contractions, braxton hicks, whats new?! I had been steadily having them off and on for the past month. I had the hardest time sleeping that night I mean worse than usual.
Fast forward to the next morning (July 19) I got out of bed very early and dealt with increasingly painful contractions. Around 7 or 8 am was when I became certain that the baby was coming.

I waited until C woke up to tell her that i was in labor. She was so happy and also in disbelief. i t seemed like we had been waiting forever for this moment! I went a few hours laboring at home until we decided to call the midwife. They told me to come to the office, and once we arrived they sent us directly to the hospital.

We decided that it would help Gregory understand better what was happening if we could include him in most of the process. He was so concerned when I was laboring and kept asking "Mommy's legs are ok??!" (lol, I guess he thought it was my legs because I kept bending them with each contraction)
I had intense contractions (back labor I would soon find out), and they became more frequent and more intense hour by hour until I finally gave up on the more natural approach and opted for the epidural by the time I had gotten into 4 or 5 hours of labor at the hospital.

At some point the epidural had slowed my contractions considerably! This was exactly why I did not want the medication, soon after I needed small amounts of pitocin to help jump start it again. I figured by the way I was progressing before the intervention that I would have delivered our son by 7pm, instead I labored until 11pm and an utterly exhausted shell of what used to be me pushed about 2 times and finally gave birth.

Finally at around 11:19pm I was holding my beautiful 8 pound 8 ounce baby boy! He didn't cry at first as I held him close to me, but eventually he belted out a loud cry as the nurses took him to the warmer for a check up. C and I felt so blessed, we couldn't believe that we actually made it to the end of the pregnancy and the beginning of our new life as parents. I know for C it was an amazing experience. I came to that revelation as I watched her so proudly pace from him to me, making calls, answering calls, boasting about how beautiful he was...
Gregory, who had gone with my dad some hours earlier came in with him to meet his new brother. At that time, I wasn't sure how he'd react but now its clear that he loves being a big brother.

What an experience! This labor was nothing that I had expected, nothing at all like my first, but still so amazing!

Soon to come, Pictures!!!!

Thanks for reading!
~smooches~

The time has come and gone!

2010-08-25T20:19:00.002-04:00

Sorry folks! It's been so long, again... but I have plenty of updates.
The one most exciting update is that we had our baby son, Jonathan, on July 19. It was such a long day and he came right before I was scheduled to be induced; but I'll save my birth story for another day. Now our son is a month old and still changing our lives daily. I will my birth story, pictures, and more details in the next coming days. We are just so busy but very excited with our life!

Updates to come!
~smooches~

Our lil J

2010-06-12T20:27:00.002-04:00

http://www.babyhomepages.net/littlejonathan
Follow this link to see 3D/4D pictures of our baby, even some video clips! Enjoy!

Pictures!

2010-06-12T19:44:00.003-04:00

I have some belly shots and some of the baby's stuff! I'm 35 Wks now (these pictures were just taken a couple days ago. Hope there not toooo boring!

.... 8 years later!

2010-06-02T19:54:00.002-04:00

Sorry it's been so long (again) I come on here all the time to keep up with what everyone else is doing but I never have time to post something myself. So, what's been up with me? Now Im 33wks and 4days preggers, everything is ready to go for our little baby boy. C and I can't wait, and the whole family is extremely happy as well. Well I know this post is short, but I'll try to get back on later with some preggy pictures, ultrasounds, and updates.

~Smooches~

lol @ Vday suprises!

2010-02-13T20:40:00.002-05:00

Ok, so this is really quick, I'm suprising C for vday with a late night desert! lol Im going to set up the bath room... I got some aroma therapy oils, candles (lots and lots of them!) I'm going to light some in the bathroom, run a bubble bath and put a robe up for her. While she's in the bathroom I'm going to set up the bedroom with more candles (lol) heart shaped cheesecake, strawberries, whipped cream and satin sheets (lol) I'm so excited. and of course I'm going to be wearing a little something special. she thinks i didnt do anything at all! Oh yea, lol and this evening I went to the store and bought myself some roses, she thinks, but tomorrow night I'm going to put the rose pettles all over the bed! lol I love being sneaky! Oh, she's about to come out of the shower! Gotta go! wish me luck!!!! lol (sorry if there are spelling oopsies! this is the fastest I've ever typed!)

This post is for Adventures in Making a Baby lol

2010-02-04T11:21:00.002-05:00

Sorry its been forever (again!) I'm finally feeling more like myself (not completely but much better!) Im 16 wks prego and C and I are so excited! Everything has been going normal in my pregnancy, the baby is healthy and strong... and very active! I can feel him all the time, probably because I've been through this before. Um, what else... oh its most likely a boy! C was so excited when we heard that news. Two boys! I can't even believe... but of course we are so happy! We probably went overboard because we already have just about everything for him, the stroller, the car seat(i had to get my son a booster seat or his "big boy seat"lol) We have clothes, the cloth diapers, changing table and crib...... idunno like I said maybe we went a little overboard! I'll post his ultrasound pictures, of course his sooo cute to us but its probably not much to look at! lol This baby is going to be so spoiled though! Already its brought our two families together. I never thought I would see the day when C and my mother are in the hot tub talking and laughing! Its just amazing! well anyway, I'll start taking pictures of my little belly soon too. Stay posted!

(to Adventures in making a baby,

C and I love your blog, we keep track of it very often to see how you and little Arden are doing! Thank you so much for being our fans too!)

Sorry its been so long!

2009-11-21T20:43:00.002-05:00

Great news though.... I'm PREGNANT!!! (6weeks) I'ts been a complete whirlwind and really un real! lol this past 2 wks I've been having morning sickness, but it didnt get bad until Tuesday now its allday kick my ass sickness! C and I just feel so blessed though and remain positive even when I'm stuck in bed all day. Also, my sons bday is coming so soon! (Nov 29th) I am so excited, my little jelly bean will be 5! such a big boy!! We bought him so many toys, and new clothes and I'm just thrilled to watch him opening them and seeing the excitement all over his cute little face! lol I really have so many blessings and I'm so happy with the life God has given us. I guess I'll be back with more news at a later time!
~smooches~

My Website

2009-09-15T16:44:00.003-04:00

Hey all, check out my art website.... its my pride and joy! Hope you enjoy and please leave feedback!

http://blackart.web.officelive.com/default.aspx

"Racial Profiling IS real" I said.

2009-09-10T20:36:00.004-04:00

I used to roll my eyes when people said that they were profiled for being black..I thought it was more than not just an excuse that people were used to throwing out there. I never experienced it first hand and I was too naive to realize when loved ones were going through it. At the end of last month, it happened to me. Nothing absolutely nothing can truly justify why I was pulled over in my vehicle, searched, and put in handcuffs. Nothing can justify why a housewife whose never been in any trouble, doesn't drive crazy or fast, wears her seat belt, pays taxes, doesn't liter, and a whole bunch of other things that anyone who follows to LAW should have been in jail for a couple hours shy of 24 and treated like a criminal on Americas Most Wanted list. This experience has completely depleted my trust and faith in police and the system in which they operate. This experience has traumatized me and effected every aspect of my life. ( I don't even want to drive again) You must be saying to yourself, "well you must have been doing something to have this happen... you don't get pulled over for nothing." You want the explanation the cop wrote on the police report? "...pulled the silver Saturn over for high suspicion of being uninsured" How do you suspect someone of not having insurance is my question? (which no one can give me an answer) and on top of that, I am fully insured with more than just the minimum coverage. I got a lawyer, without me even offering suggestions this white male from Alabama is convinced that I am a victim of DWB (driving while black-racial profiling).
When this is a time I have so many things to be thankful for and to celebrate, I have to deal with the presumption that I am a criminal with court dates and paying fees.... I've never needed a lawyer before. It sickens me.... I can't sleep without dreaming (or nighmaring is more like it) about being in jail, or police or getting arrested. I can't be without my wife for more than 30mins without worrying sick if the same thing has happen to her. I am not someone who is completely guilty of a crime and trying to argue my way right, I am an innocent woman who has just come to the actualization that this country is not free of these types of things. Sometimes I can't believe it and I know it doesn't even "seem like" that big of a deal, but it's devastating to me. I needed to vent so I wrote this blog, but to all who thinks racial profiling doesn't exist anymore... beware because it definitely does.

Back Again

2009-09-08T09:59:00.003-04:00

It's been awhile since my last post... I used to come on here everyday, but since our failed attempt in Aug, I've found myself keeping away from all things TTC! Well, to update you, we've decided the best time to try our 3rd insemination would be when we both felt the timing was perfect. We're going to keep mid October open, but only pursue it if it feels "right". Another time may be in early December, so I guess you can say our plans for ttc are tentative. I've been concentrating more on my school, my friends (including the ones ttc and wishing the best for them) and counting all of the blessings I already have like my family, my relationship, my son, my health... and the list goes on and on. So We will see aye. TTC not on hold, but just sometime in the future and my outlook is great.
ttyl

~Smooches~

OK, on to the next try....

2009-08-06T22:55:00.003-04:00

So, tomorrow I'll be waiting all day (again) for this Dewar to come.....then off to AL. the mood is completely different than it was before, less stressed, less anxiety, less worry and uneasiness of the unknown. We're almost acting like this isn't happening again, except for the occasional "it's Friday tomorrow, are you ready"s that we've had once or twice today. I don't know, maybe its better to be like this. I feel so much more freer.... not strung up like last time. I've been able to come to grips with the fact that even if we have a perfect insemination, absolutely perfect timing that its not up to us if this happens; only God can allow this at this time. So with that being said, I guess I'll be heading into this again starting tomorrow, but hopefully I'll be strong enough not to let it get the best of me.
~smooches~

:-(

2009-07-31T09:19:00.001-04:00

So there was no need for a HPT, my period made me fully understand.... on to round two.

2009-06-27T14:08:00.001-04:00

RE:Question!

2009-06-24T11:49:00.003-04:00

So last night I posted a question, Should your family and friends have an opinion when your TTC..... I didn't necessarily want to know an answer to help me, but I like hearing what others have to say about different subjects. So the reason I asked is since Candace and I have been talking about having a baby, we get a lot of "advice" and opinions that we were not always asking for. Friends and family can sometimes change your decisions because you trust and maybe look for their advice. However in our case, our family is not very supportive of our relationship. I often say if Candace was a man and all of these things were happening, my parents dreams would be coming true! lol She's perfect for me and they all like her a lot, but I'm sure they are just wishing she was not with me, so we depend on our immediate family for advice and opinions when making big decisions like whether or not to have another child. (By immediate family I mean, Candace, myself, and our 4 year old.) But I'm sure for other families outside opinions may be needed. I want to know how others deal with this subject, so please comment and let us know!
:-)
*Thanks to Katwomyn4 for the wonderful comment!!

Question!

2009-06-23T17:18:00.002-04:00

While TTC, should the decision to start the process include the opinions of family and friends? Should others in your life influence if you want to have a baby or not? Let me know what you think, and I'll be back later to give my thoughts as well!

Smooches

I'm Fertile!!!

2009-06-20T11:37:00.005-04:00

Haha, I know that's so little but soooo big! I've been tracking and charting since last night and I am indeed very fertile! :-) So, hopefully next month the moon and the stars will be aligned and this will work! (ah, I'm so anxious!) Question: How do you deal with the stress and anxiety of TTC? Is there a magic solution or mysterious home remedy? Or is this anxiety and stress just something that sticks around and has to be dealt with? Let me know what you think! I found this webpage on about.com that addresses such an issue. http://infertility.about.com/od/copingwithinfertility/Dealing_with_Infertility_Managing_the_Stress_of_Infertility.htm

So this weekend starts our 2-3 week school vacation, what to do? I'm looking forward to just spending tlc time.... well as much as our 4 yr old will let us spend together. Well, that's all I got right now.... so until next time

Smooches!

ERRRR!

2009-06-18T00:51:00.002-04:00

OMG! all I have to say is FINALS SUCK!!!!

I'm sooooo tired! One more final to go (for me) Two more for the misses!

blah.

time to get off the books and into bed with my hunny!

(i'm missing you right now @ 12:54 if you ever read this...your already asleep right now, so I'm commin babe!)

Smooches!

1st Blog ever!

2009-06-16T19:56:00.000-04:00

This is my first blog ever!! My wife and I are trying to add a member to our family; 4yr old son, and 8mo old Chihuahua named Lucy “lulu”. We have been looking into this for a few months now, and its about that time to give it a try. We’ve registered with a sperm bank, picked out possible sperm donors… and now it’s all about timing my period….. ugh, but what a headache! Maybe I have an irregular period, or my cycle is short, but whatever it is I had my last menstrual cycle on around May 23rd and its back on again! But it’s well worth the irritation! I went to FertilityFriend.com and started my conception calendar. Basically, it has all sorts of charts and calendars to help you figure out when your most fertile so you can optimize conception, or avoid it! So today is CD 3 (CD=Cycle day, which starts on the first day of your period) I was reading this couples blog about their journey through conception and successful pregnancy, and my wife convinced me that I should keep a blog too. I mean, I guess this is a great idea and its something we’ll have to look back on in the future!
Well that’s all for now. I’m doing so much research and thinking about this whole baby thing, so you’ll def me hearing from me soon!
Smooches!